• Gently and indirectly probe the issue:
– I’ve noticed you’ve been distracted lately, and you don’t really seem to ‘be yourself.’ I am concerned about you, and am wondering if there is anything I can do to assist you?
– I’ve noticed a change in your work in the past few months. You are not as productive, you are frequently late for work, often leave early, and have missed a few meetings. I am concerned about you, and about your work performance – is there anything I can do to help you improve or get back on track?
If abuse is acknowledged, accept her/his reluctance to talk about it. Listening is the first step, and it may take time and several conversations before she/he will verbalize that she/he is being abused. Be there and be patient.
• Show concern and be supportive:
– I am concerned for your safety.
– You are not responsible for what your partner has done to you.
– You don’t deserve to be verbally, emotionally or physically abused.
– Without intervention the abuse likely will get worse.
– I will support you and your decisions.
– This affects your children, too.
• Let her/him know that domestic violence is a crime and that she/he can seek protection from the courts.
• Listen in a non-judgmental way.
• Provide information about company and community resources and suggest safety planning.
• Do not tell the person what you think she/he should do. Respect the person’s ability and responsibility for solving her/his own problems (when connected with appropriate resources).
• Do not try to physically intervene. Call Corporate Security or the police.
• Do not offer to go to the person’s home to get their things or have the person stay with you.
• Contact your HR Generalist or Corporate Security to apprise them of any suspected domestic violence situation immediately.
RESPOND to an abuser:
• Don’t reinforce the behavior in any way.
• Tell him/her you are uncomfortable when he/she insults or puts down his partner.
• Maintain that there is no excuse for violence.
• Indicate that you are concerned for his/her well-being.
• Do not try to physically intervene.
• Don’t be judgmental of the person – just their behavior.
• Provide information about company and community resources.
• Contact your HR generalist or Corporate Security if you suspect that one of your associates is an abuser.